HellaFrank

Some very important people came to New York this weekend… the 49ers, my friend Jared from San Francisco and my cousin Marc. I thought we should all get together at some point, so we decided to go to the 49ers game against the New York Giants.

It was fun to go to a new stadium and see New York sports fans at their finest. There was a guy in front of me that was literally pulling up the leg on his shorts, stomping his foot and squealing like a pig when the Giants returned a fumble for 72 yards. I wish I had video, because nothing I can write can do this guy justice.

Here’s a picture of me and Jared. If you look really closely in the background you can see the embarrassing score. As you may be able to tell, we may have had a drink or two too many last night:

Sorry for not writing for a while — a lot going on a lot of fun being had, but I didn’t forget about you loyal HellaFrank readers!

Since I got to New York, I’ve been eating like a ravenous beast. Everything I’ve had is pretty damn good (anyone heard of Manchurian food? It’s a Chinese/Indian mix, fantastic). Anyways, the most gluttonous eating I’ve done hasn’t been at dinner or brunch or any regular meal. It has generally taken place between the hours of 2am and 4am and represents some of the most amazing eating experiences since I got here.

When people stumble out of bars here and want a late-night snack, the question isn’t “what’s open?” Instead, you will more commonly hear “what do you want to eat?” What I mean, is that the choices here at that time of the night/morning are amazing. I have seen sandwiches, tacos, pizza, halal food (see below), Jewish delis, hot dogs, giant pretzels and even knishes… yeah, 24 hour knishes. I’m sure there are a ton more I haven’t seen.

Personally, I have hit up the pizza, tacos and halal food and it’s all pretty amazing that time of day. For those who do not know what halal food is (as I didn’t when I got here), it’s generally a cart on the corner that cooks chicken and lamb and puts it over rice or in a pita with white and/or red sauce. Yes, they call it white and red sauce… What’s in it? Who cares, it’s incredible. I ate some at about 4am on Friday night and was not hungry until about 2pm the next day. The best part is that in a city of $12 drinks and $20 hamburgers, it’s refreshing to get painfully full for only four bucks.

The number of stores and restaurants that are open 24 hours is remarkable, but there is one that takes the cake. A block down from me is a hardware store, open 24 hours. I mean, I guess I can understand needing a plunger or something at a weird hour of the night, but this is a full-on hardware store, four floors. Are there people that just get the urge to pick up a table saw at 3 in the morning? I guess so. Personally, I’ll just wait till tomorrow morning to pick one of those up.

For those of you who have spent a lot of time in New York, let me know in the comments what your favorite late night places are. I welcome all suggestions!

I love New York accents. I’ve heard them in movies before and seen people on TV talking with them, but now I’m hearing them all for the first time for real.

First day here, I walked by construction worker — hard hat with an American flag, Italian guy, smoking a cigarette. As I walked by, I caught one small snippet of his conversation when he said, “Hey, dat was like two or tree days ago!” Not a misspelling, when I said “tree” I meant “tree.”

Since then, I’ve heard them all — Queens, Brooklyn, Long Island, Staten Island (and a few dirty Boston accents mixed in there, not so much a fan of that one). Basically my dilemma right now is trying to decide which one I’m going to adopt. They’re all great, but I’m leaning toward Queens. Not sure if I’m badass enough to pull that off though.

So, I defer to you, which accent should I adopt? It will take time to get it down, but I think I can do it. Maybe I can consult Frank Caliendo, the most amazing impressionist I’ve ever seen — if you’ve been watching the MLB playoffs (AKA, the Cubs getting spanked) you know what I mean. Here is a video with a bunch of his impressions… Incredible, brilliant. Make sure you watch the Bush, Madden and Deniro ones:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAMIlPudalQ]

Before I get into this post, I need to state my opinion (or is it now fact) that Matt Holliday did not touch home plate last night. If I were a Padres fan, I would be so angry, like this guy. And, I’m calling ‘roids on Matt Holliday’s forearms. Are you kidding me? They are as big as Barry Bonds’ human-growth-hormone-enlarged head!

Now the real story here, is that the game ended at 12:30 a.m. I keep finding myself awake well after midnight watching sporting events here — Monday Night Football, West Coast baseball. If you want to catch the beginning of Monday Night Football on the West Coast after work, you better leave early and hustle home. Here? You can leave late, have a nice dinner, take a little nap, feed the cat and then flip on the TV in time to catch Tony Kornheiser say his first annoying comment.

Everyone talks about the winter, the intense people and the traffic here, but to be honest, this whole latenight sports thing is gonna be the toughest one to get used to (unless I was a Yankees fan, which I’m not).

Wednesday and Thursday are the first Cubs games at 10 pm ET… So if you need to get in touch either day, please believe I’ll be up till at least 1 am!